Big Girl Bekah!

That is a phrase you hear alot in our house these days, and she sure loves to hear it!
( and just as a side note, i started working on this post TWO weeks ago! and yes, i know that it has been over a month since i have posted! yikes!)
 Anyways, here are a few reasons why we call her Big Girl Bekah:

1. She does not want to sit in a high chair anymore, both at home and in the restarant. At home, she had been using her booster chair, but even that became a thing of the past. ( My chair cushions need a good washing by now!) She refuses towear a bib as well and now I look at all of her bibs, wondering what to pack away and what to use for Benjamin! Crazy!
Funny how she is more independant in this area, but yet needs us to "feed her" her brocoli and other things that she used to be into but not as much so anymore. . .

2. Now that she is two, she goes to swim lessons without mommy! I go behind the "police window" and watch from a distance and it was only hard on her the first day, after that, she did great! I was also loving the fact that I did not have to put on a bathing suit every single day, I wasn't missing the "mommy and me" concept too much!

See how the teacher sits the other two on the steps to play with toys and then works with the 3rd child? It was a great system and Bekah enjoyed both her time with the teacher and her play time. After 3 weeks of swim lessons, he now can "scale the wall" like spiderman, blow bubbles, kick her feet, move her arms and even flip from tummy to her back!

3. And last, but not least, she decided to stop wearing diapers and start wearing pannies, which means, she is potty training!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, so here is her story, as every child goes through this process in their own special way!

Bekah's Potty Story

(sort of long, but I wanted to both document it and help anyone else out if they are interested!)

For many months now, she has had some friends who she knows goes potty in the toilet, such as Evie, Izzie, Barrett and Mason. We talk about it, and we discuss what it means. How they don't wear diapers, where they go potty, and so on. Whenever we are with them, more often than not, she makes the request to go potty in the toilet too, and never actually goes, but shows interest. Up until that point, she had gone only a few times before her nightly bath, in the toilet, for that was a routine we started about 3 months ago.

Well, the weekend before Evie was going to stay with us, we were at Target and I asked Bekah if she wanted to buy some pannies, like Evie. She said yes, and was quite excited about the princess aspect of them. We talked alot about how "she doesn't want to go peepee on princesses, so if she wore them, she would have to go in the potty!" Teehee, good thing this girl loves princesses so much, such a notion was absurd to her! Here she is with her new pannies, she had to hold them on the drive home:

I originally thought I would put her in them with Evie being here, some positive peer pressure, but Bekah was having some "tummy troubles" which could hardly be contained in a diaper, let alone pannies! So, that took the back burner for a few days!

Then, on the following Tuesday, July19th, Bekah saw her newly washed pannies on the floor, needing to be put away and , she asked to wear them. By that point I was a bit more reserved about starting this commitment and wasn't sure if I had the energy to potty train her. Well! She had other thoughts on the matter! I reminded her if she wore them, she had to go potty in the toilet, not in them and she seemed very into the idea. Before putting them on her though, I told her we had a new friend to meet, who also uses a potty, like Evie, named Emma. Emma is the Corelle doll that you can buy who actually takes a bottle and when you squeeze her belly, she will pee in her own little potty that comes with her. A friend of mine had let us borrow it about a month ago, insisting that Bekah was the perfect candidate for such a method, because of her doll appreciation. My friend was completely right and we are so grateful to Emma! After teaching Emma what to do, cheering her on, giving her treats when she goes, and just going through all the steps, one hour later, I asked Bekah if she was still ready to wear her panies like Emma. She of course said yes and we were off!

I told her, just like Emma, she too would get treats for using the potty, and that would be 4 penut butter chips. I chose 4 because she sometimes skips over 3 and 4, when counting : ) and thought this would help. I also thought maybe it would be less sugar than other treats?? Either way, it was quite motivating because the first day, I took her every hour, on the hour, and she always went, teehee, sometimes just a dribble, but she went, regardless, that girl wanted her treats! I made her count them out each time too. And now, about one month later, I can say, we are much more consistant with counting accurately!

Okay, so, first day went well and dandy, then, night time came and I taught her what pull ups were for, not for going potty in, but special undies for sleeping in. She was good with it ( especially since they too have princesses on them!) and the day ended with lots of praise and encouragement from grandparents, daddy and even "Charlie was proud of her!" 

Day 2

Woke up next day, and of course, her pull up was wet, but she did have a good morning pee, which suggested that when she did wake up in her crib, she did not immediately go, but waited for us to get her out. We put her undies on her, and then, proceeded to always take Emma with us, right before the hour mark to encourage her to go, and then, go ourselves. Now, that morning, she did have her first accident, and was VERY upset about it. I showed no sign of dissapointment, Emma and I both told her it was okay, and we moved on.. But I was secretly glad it happened because now we had a frame of reference for "holding it" and how we did not like the way we felt when we did not. It was great! I was a bit nervous though, because a friend of ours had invited us over to their house that morning for a playdate and with Bekah's suddent interest in wearing undies, was not prepared to keep her housebound that week. I called my friend and cancled with her. Well, she pretty much demanded that we come over anyways, and to bring Emma while we were at it! She wanted to "support" me in something that her daughter would one day need support in too! She was awesome about it! I prepped Bekah on the way over there, "are you going to pee in Abby's toilet or on her carpet? In her toilet or on her couch?" Each time, she would excitedly say, "toilet!" : ) And that she did! I was so proud of her for going at someone else's house, and we felt so blessed to have such supportive friends, pretty much right outside the door cheering Bekah on! : ) From the get go, Bekah has had no problem going on the big girl potty and I am very grateful she does not have a fear of it. We had used a Dora seat cover in the past, when she went before her bath, but if we are downstairs, we just use the toilet as is, and it is fine! I am happy we never got stuck on the toddler toilet either. Though we do own one, it is mostly used as a stool and she does not prefer it, which makes it easy when we travel or go to public places.

Going number 2 wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. 2nd day, she went during her nap ( as she tends to do) and she woke up upset that her pull up was all dirty ( she wears pull ups for naps as well). We talked alot about it, I reasured her that it was okay , but did tell her if she tried to go in the potty, she could have a cupcake ( that my friend had kindly dropped off at my house because i wasn't feeling well! great timing!). I caught her with "that look" on her face, and mid way through, picked her up and plopped her on the toilet! (Yes, she went #2 twice that day!) Though upset that her undies were dirty, she was pretty excited that she "pooped in the toilet!" We all celebrated, she called MayMay, and then, I gave her her cupcake! This was the last day, up until the present that #2 has occured during naptime, I was so worried that it would mess up her naps, but she always goes, before or after! What a big girl! She learned!

Here is a pic of Bekah, Emma and her cupcake! 

A better shot of the elements. I included the book a friend lent me, "Potty Train Your Child in One Day." A great book that I had to plow through, not knowing that my daughter was ready the day she declared she was!

That day was a Wednesday and from Wednesday to Saturday, she proceded to do very well! We had  one more peepee accident, all but one of her naptime pull ups were dry, and we were still going on the hour, every hour. Life did not stop for us that week, we still went to swim lessons ( and talked alot about not going in our swim diapers, because that would make the water dirty- and I know that she basically didn't because after the lesson she always went potty for a long time), made the dreaded trip to HEB and I watched my little sweet girl sit on a public bathroom toilet for rhe first time ( yuck!) and went to friends houses. That Friday, we were at playgroup and I just knew she was going to get distracted by playingand have an accident ( heck my kindergartener's still did that and they were 5!) so I was quite nervous, but after an hour, she happily went potty! It was great! Only thing was, I didn't realize how long it took for us to "say goodbye" and the next thing I knew another hour had passed and when we were walking out to our car, she stopped suddenly and said, "Oh no, Bekah going potty on the grass!" I couldn't help but giggle because she was associating herself with Charlie, who we had been talking about goes potty on the grass : ).  It was fine and by that day, I had realized how important it was to have wipes, an extra outfit and undies at all times ( luckily she was not wearing shoes  at the time, that's another thing that get's dirty!) Funny how Bekah picked that week to potty train, because right after that accident we had on the grass, we were supposed to head home to pick up daddy and go to SA for the weekend! Traveling and potty training was a challenge, but, with us, traveling is a part of life, so better sooner than later! We put her in a pull up that night declaring that she would be "going to sleep" in the car, hoping she did not sense any kind of lack of confidence in her. She didn't mind one bit and thought nothing of it since she was wearing her jammies. That's been a valuable thing, making no difference between the undies and the pull ups, other than one is for sleeping , one is not.

The weekend went really well too! She got lots of praise from May May and Grandpa AND got to join in the potty using fun with her big boy friend Alex! I think that made her feel special, that she got to do what he was doing, because the Isaacsons were in town that weekend too, staying with my parents! : )

Big news that weekend was, she went number 2 in the toilet completely, for the first time! Yay! It was such a shocker, especially since we were at a friend's house! Timing worked out great though because all the other mommies and kids were excited for her when she came out of the bathrooom and I think it made another great impression on Bekah!

Special thanks to the Isaacsson, Seamans and Reynolds for being so excited for my little girl! And a special congrats to the Reynolds for their new baby girl, Hannah! That is why we were at their house, to meet Hannah!  I will be doing a post about that fun weekend soon!

From then, making it to the toilet for #2 has been nothing but successful and of course, going number one as well! 5 days into it and I was SUPER surprised with how well it was going! Oh and the newest treat for going number 2 was, chocolate milk! She had never had such a tasty treat and was totally on board with it! I only filled the sippy cup up 1/4 with milk and we poured the chocolate in together, it was a fun routine!  The only negative detail I was sensing was how upon the 6th or 7th day, she seemed to be getting irritated with my asking her every hour. My friend suggested that starting the next Tuesday ( one week later), I only ask her every hour and a half. As hard as it was, I did it and just as suspected, no accidents and she seemed to appreciate the change : ). After doing that for one or two days, I told her, if she could start telling me when she had to go, I would give her a bonus peanut butter chip and it only took one time for her to grasp that great new game rule : ). I think what helped her "know" that she had to go was whenever I was doing more of a 1 1/2 hour watch, if she started to grab herself or act like she wanted to go, I would say the words, "do you need to go potty?" and I think that helped connect it. That one accident we had the 2nd day I know also stuck with her as a feeling she wanted to avoid. That week, being the week I let up some control, also became the week where she felt confident enough to tell me, "no, bekah doesn't have to go" which definitely did not help me in the anxiety department, as I pictured her having an accident in the carseat or out running an errand. So, either I just had to roll with it and trust her, or I would encourage Emma to go first, and that many times, would promote her to go in the end. If she wanted a "bonus" chip after that, I had to explain to her that she did not "tell mommy" but how proud I am that she chose to go in the potty and not the store we were about to go to. It was a really great transition. I feel like all of the transitions have been natural, and when she was ready.

So after I sort of handed over the job of when to go to Bekah, she did really well with it and her treats sort of took the back burner in importance, which was soooo nice because I wondered how I would "ween" her of them, but she sort of did it on her own! There are times now when I may remind her of them, because maybe she hasn't gone in 3 hours and we are about to leave the house, or she won't wash her hands in a public restroom and I remind her of the peanut butter chips, but for the most part, she has forgotten about them : ).

Now we are on week 5 or 6, and we are "leaving our mark" everywhere we go these days and I am sooo proud of her! Learning to be patient while going #2 was a mini hurtle we had to get over, I tried singing to her, handing her a book, you know, anything to keep her on the toilet and she eventually learned how it benefited her if she waited. She is never scared to go #1 or #2 in public and I am very grateful for that.  I could go on and on about this topic that has sort of been "our life" this past month, but, I will spare you any more ramble. I just really want this post to help other mommies figure out what is best for their child, so I will recap the highlights and share what I have learned:

1. There is a window of time that your child is ready or not, and they will tell you or you will see signs

2. Peer Pressure can be powerful- teaching a doll to go, watching a friend go/hearing that they go helps

3. Pull Ups can be a valuable part of potty training if they don't know that it is okay if they have an accident in them. The idea of them being for "sleeping" totally worked for my little girl who needs a reason for everything!

4. It was a very challenging time, keeping up with her and constantly tweaking and being flexible, but by no means was it bad or negative. It's soooo exciting to watch them grow up like this! I felt like I was in potty training boot camp, but when she would say, "Bekah's poopoo is brown like your hair, mama!" or would just beam with pride after going, it was all the encouragement I needed to keep doing what I knew my daughter was ready for!

5. Once they get the hang of it, man can they hold if for a long time! Bekah's pull up was dry the past few nights in fact! It's alot of control that I had to give up, trusting her to not have an accident. Now, I fully trust her to hold #1, but just yesterday, she went #2 in the toilet at the dr.'s office, but then, had to go AGAIN, and didn't quite make it!

6. Public potties are and can be VERY gross, and you see them in a whole new light when it is your child sitting on them, but I don't leave the house without my diaper caddy that contains- clorox wipes ( to wipe down the toilet beforehand), flushable wipes ( because public bathroom toilet paper is cheap and will break apart on you!), extra pair of undies AND pull up, and lots of hand sanitizer! Wash those hands with soap and wanter and THEN use that sanitizer as well!

7. Invovlving other people, like friends and family members, really makes a difference, Bekah has recieved so much praise from everyone and it helped her move from doing it "for the treats" to realizing she was a big girl and this is what big girls do, when she sees how everyone is so proud of her.

8. Accidents, though never fun to deal with, have only been a lesson learned for me or Bekah.

9. Talking about it makes a HUGE difference! Here is an example of what we like to say at our house:

" Do you want to go peepee in your carseat or in your potty?"

"Do you want to go poopoo in Lina's potty or on her couch?"

"Do you want to go peepee on your princesses panies or in the potty?"

We talk about EVERTHING!

10. And last but not least, I learned that SHE was in charge of this whole ordeal and it was my job to support her, figure out what motivates her, praise her, and give her every ounce of patience and energy I had!

And so, we say goodbye to Emma who had to go back to Catherine's house the other day, to help her with potty training! We cleaned her and talked about what a good friend she was to Bekah and how we hope to be a good friend to other people who need to learn how to go potty in the toilet as well!

Starting this at 7 months pregnant, in the hottest summer yet, I couldn't have asked for a more energetic, more capable or funny little girl to move through this milestone together with!

 I am soooooo proud of you Big Girl Bekah! Whoo-hoo!

(That should be it for now, in terms of big milestone changes, other than officially becomming a big sister, for we LOVE our crib and I don't think the toddler bed is in our future anytime soon, who knows though with Bekah!)